My own personal Edward Cullen

I was pissed off, why? Because when arrogance comes in the form of a guy like that, it's the natural reaction from me.

(Don't get this wrong, there's nothing 'loving' going on between us - well, I don't think so)

He called me Saturday night, drunk, and it was the first time I've ever heard his voice - which was interesting, he's a guitar-player and told me that he couldn't sing and my first reaction had been 'A guitar-player that does not sing? Then his voice must be... ugly?'

It's wasn't, though when I hear guys that speak with that soft accent that he did I always find them just a tad gay. Mostly because my accent sounds masculine.

We've been joking around for two weeks (but I've had contact with him for over 6 months) and we text each other almost whole nights about different things. He's helping me out a lot with my writing and even offered to read it so I would get it right.

He's also very good at reading people, he always predicts my reactions and he's always right. He's funny as hell too, he always cracks me up but last night, something happened.

I had just called him stalker when he (Let's call him E as in Edward) texted me this.

E: btw, don't fall in love with me. :p

Uuuuh.. I was kinda confused but thought that he was kidding, of course, what else?

Me: But you're so pretty, it's hard not to! :p

This is how we roll, we declare out undying love for each other and then laugh about it. Two days ago I proposed to him, offering to buy him for 17 US dollars and promising to gaze lovingly at him when he introduced me to his parents.

I also told him that it was hard to find true love for that kind of price. (You see, we laugh a lot)

Well, turns out he wasn't kidding about the warning. In 2 minutes he turned from this funny, nice guy to an asshole and I was kinda pissed off. Not by the fact that he was warning me but by the fact that he actually thought that I would risk my whole being by falling for him.

He's a player by heart, a different kind of player - he's the first I've actually enjoyed talking to but suddenly this?

Then it hit me.

He always predicts my reaction and suddenly he's trying to push me away? (I know he's got trust issues) He knows what a stubborn person I am and a warning like that would lead me to stop talking to him all together, maybe not since I still need his help with my writing.

That's why I texted him today saying;

I've figured you out! You're a vampire and you're worried about eating me!

Pedophiles

Yes, you heard me right.

I only slept for about 5 hours tonight. Why? I'll tell you why. Soon.

Racists are bad people, well, maybe not bad people but they sure as hell aren't very bright people. Rapist though, they're bad people.

And where does pedophiles fit in? Nowhere, everywhere they got, they get spit on. Don't get me wrong, they deserve it.

So, yesterday I was talking to my friend, TA, over MSN and somehow we got talking about fake identities. Of course I told him about one I had when I was 16, my alterego and slut, 18 year old Elinore - Ellie.

TA says:
Haha, you're just like me! I have a alterego too! Her name is Amy and she's 12, it's a great way of busting pedophiles.

(Wait, what? Pedophiles? With Elinore I just wanted to show guys that it was never a good idea to show skin to a perfect stranger. My routine was that I would put lots and lots of makeup on, start my cam and look cute in my ponytales then paus the webcam to switch seats with a guy-friend of mine.

Busting pedophiles hadn't even crossed my mind.

Well, not busting since tricking people into doing crimes is illegal in Sweden - I don't know, is that a stupid law?

Anyways, he told me that he pretended to be 12 and when the pedophiles told him the information he needed he started his cam - showing off a not-so-12 fullgrown man waving at the cam and telling them that "I have your address, I have your phonenumber and I can tell your girlfriend all about this!"

The reason TA does this, is to punish the pedophiles in his own way - Leaving them like insomniacs as they know that there is someone out there that knows their true identity and there is noway that they can stop this person)


Suddenly I found myself not being able to sleep, it was past midnight and "Amy" talked to over 6 guys last night - one was busted, though I don't know how that one ended - and I was kind of thinking "Seriously, if they think a 12-year old is up by this time then they deserve getting busted.

But there's a few questions I have.

Pedophiles, are they sick? I mean like mentally sick - Can you get help for stuff like that? How often do you hear about a man/woman getting to rehab because they like under-aged boys and girls?

Kept up by PlaystationMove and a poker-playing friend.

This whole week I've had a lot on my mind, being confused isn't an easy thing but it's getting less and less confusing so I'm lucky like that.

So, to keep my mind off of things I've spent my evenings with my friend, F, playing video-games (we finished The Resistance: Fall of Man a couple of days ago, both sad and happy with that) But Wednesday she got home PlayStationMove so now we've been spending our evenings with playing table tennis, archery and bowling. NICE.

But coming home by midnight isn't a very smart thing, especially not when you've got a poker-playing friend that spends his nights in front of the computer and just loves to tease you. That way, I haven't gotten much sleep this whole week.

Today I'm taking it easy with my mom, I'll probably meet F and SZ later today. Nice :)

The swedendemocrats, my hetro-friend and my dike-friends.

I have nothing against homosexuals, my best friend is a gay, my cousin is gay and my mother's brother is gay. I'm raised with the image that homosexuality is OK and totally normal.


But I couldn't help to say this to my gay-friend's ex-girlfriend.

It was Saturday (Sunday - yesterday - was the election-day) A, the ex.gf, complained about not wanting to vote on the most famous politicians so I said 'Well then, vote for the christ-democrats. I bet they don't have that many fans'. Stupidly, I didn't think about the fact that most religious people don't accept homosexuals. But she probably thought I was joking with her so she didn't say anything.

I was sitting right infront of the TV with F, playing The Resistance: Fall of Man, when I heard A saying to my gay-friend SZ. "The swedendemocrats isn't racist! How can you say that?"
F, feeling the same way about swedendemocrats as me, turned around and said. "No, you're right. Four years ago they were Nazis so I guess there's a difference"
A frowned. "That's.. Well, they don't wanna send all the immigrants home!"

This is where I spoke up. "Yes they do, with the oldest argument ever. They wanna send them home because they are different. Different from us, so when they're done with the foreigners maybe they'll take on the dikes because let's face it" I turned around. "You are different from us normals"

My statement was met with silence. Of course I wasn't serious, this was my sarcastic way of proving my point.

If the swedendemocrats weren't racist, they would've chosen a more neutral name. I can't start a politic-party named The Hetrodemocrats and say 'No, of course I don't have a problem with homosexuals'

(I DON'T have a problem with homosexuals, but I think you see my point)

A didn't say anything, she knows I wasn't serious but I think it hurt her feelings a little bit when I told her that she and SZ is different from us normals. But hey, immigrants endure this everyday in our country.

This is all for me now.
xoxo

Molly. 

Politicians, racists and then little me.

I hate politicians and I wish they were allowed to use sarcasm, it's the best way of getting your point through someones else's thick skull.

Again, I hate politics and I stay away from it as far as I can but since it's election-day this Sunday, then it's pretty hard to ignore.

Swedendemocrats. What do they sound like?Democrats that want to help Sweden? WRONG.


Their only policy is 'Sweden is great, Swedes are greater and let's send back all those immigrants back to their own country!'.

Yeah well, F U.

They wanna start with the criminal immigrants and that I can understand, if someone - who's not from Sweden - commits... let's say murder... in Sweden then yeah, why should we spend money on him/her in our prisons? But then again, the Swedish legal sucks so he/she would only get like 10 years maximum for murder so he/she probably wouldn't cost us that much. Even if they say 10 years they'll probably let him/her out after 4 years.


Sure, send criminals 'home'.

Though, here is what's wrong. They wanna send the whole family back to their own country with the criminal, because (and I quote) 'They're all the same'

I don't wanna make Sweden seem racist, I'm ashamed for Swedendemocrats - We need to focus on getting more jobs but they focus on keeping Sweden as Swedish as possible.

And what do they count as 'immigrants and foreigners'? My best friend is part German (I know because I tease her a lot), my dad's sister is adopted from Chile (she just got a kid with a Swede), my mom's sister got two grown-up kids with a man from Turkey, whom she still lives with.

If they get to rule Sweden, what happens with us? Are they gonna send my cousins to other countries? Countries where they don't know the language and they're gonna start living there? Working there?


They're just doing to other countries that they feel that other countries do to us.



These poeple, Swedendemocrats, are impossible to talk to. Believe me I've tried, I was called a child who lives in a fairytale-world and don't know what real life is and they also said that I called them racist. (Please, I wouldn't stoop so low unless you actually said something racist) And they tried teaching me what the word 'Nazi' really meant.

Well, they asked me if I wanted it explained and my reply was "No, because I have a feeling you're gonna make Nazi sound like something good and that makes me sick"


Sorry for the rant, I just got so pissed now when I thought about it.

Have a great day!
xoxo
Molly
(who's not voting for the Swedendemocrats)

Po-po-po psycho-face!

I'm not gonna talk about poker as if I've played it before.
Well, of course I've played it. (Texas hold 'em to be precise)

And what have I learned?

First of all, the guy who's answering my question is a guy I never met (we keep contact through texting and over MSN, he lives in Sweden) and now when I know a little about poker, I never want to meet him.

He's probably not a bad guy, no, correction. He's not a bad guy, he's a jerk and a douche-bag sometimes but he's definitely not bad.

I've learned some of the psychology behind the poker, not the Will I win? Will I loose?- kind of psychology. No, the bluffing, the double-bluffing and all that. Not only psychology, but also reversed psychology.

Example. "I'm gonna make him believe I'm bluffing" (You're not bluffing but you act like you are by doing the same 'tells' - body-language - as when you bluff. By that, you bluff him by not bluffing)

Tells is something you do without thinking about it, like pulling your hair, blinking to much or sudden calmness.

That's the thing, poker teaches you to always be aware of suddenness, a very hyper-player goes calm... Why? A very calm player goes hyper, why? What's he doing?

You can never tell what they're doing but by learning the pattern in their playing (also known under 'information') you can also learn when they bluff, if they bluff or if they're just bluff-bluffing.


One word for you; Psychogame!

Back to the, 'I never want to meet him'.


Seriously, a player never stops to play the game. For me, poker looks like a way of living. He's not just good with the cards, he's good with the people and the world around him is his poker-table and he can bend it at his will.

You only see of him what he wants you to see while he's seeing all.

I might tell you more about the poker-playing.
I think it's fascinating :D
xoxo
Molly.

Coughing and writing.

Though it is my mom doing the coughing.

She's sick and I promised her to clean the house for her, now I'm waiting for my father to buy some cleaning-stuff so I can start already.

I hate cleaning, it's not only boring but all I can think is; GOD! This is boring!
And let me tell you, it takes more energy to think about how boring it is than actually do the cleaning. Feels great afterwards though :)

Today I'm testing something new.

I'm going to listen to my favorite music and let the new story - that I'm writing with D - run through my head, maybe come up with some new ideas. After that I'm spending my whole day in front of the computer, waiting for D's next e-mail. (Well, I hope he's gonna send me one later today)

Ugh! I'm hungry, maybe I'll have to eat something before I start cleaning. (*gasp* did you hear that?! That's me making excuses so I can push the cleaning out of my agenda! Lucky me my good side ain't letting that happen)

So. I'm off.
Have a great day!

xoxo
Molly.

Co-labbing, Iphone 4 and Vampire Diaries

I've never co-labbed with another writer before.

But I'm trying and I'm excited! It's gonna be so much fun, especially since I already have fallen in love with the main-characters. I think I would describe them as 'messed-up beyond repair' in a Go-extreme-or-go-the-fuck-home! kind of way.

I ordered my new phone today, it's gonna help me out in my writing and keeping in touch with my web-friends. It would be awesome if it had been as easy to contact my web-friends as easily as I contact my other friends.

Talking about friend, S is going to Turkey tomorrow so I won't be seeing or hearing from her for a whole week. Well, she'll probably text me on Wednesday or Thursday telling me how tanned, well-bathed and drunk she is... Bitch.

Oh yeah, Mike called me two days ago, he started telling the story about how he got his Iphone 4 home and how stupid he was. His regular simcard didn't fit in the new phone so he called Iphone support or something. They told him to cut the card til it fitted or he could send it in.

Tss, my man is he's own man and likes to show it.

So he cut the card wihtout hesitation. I repeat; without hesitation. He didn't save his contact on the phone, or anything else. He just cut it.

And he cut it too small so it doesn't work in his Iphone, but get this. It doesn't work on his old cellphone either so now his without a phone til next week.

When he finished his tale - and told me 300 times that he's so stupid - he goes quiet. I ponder for a sec before I said "Did you call because you wanted me to agree to your stupidness?"
Mike: Uuhm. No, I called to say that you can only reach me on my home-phone. It's just! I got so excited and the next second I had already cut my simcard.

I sighed. There really wasn't any reason for me to tell him how stupid he was to do that, he understood that himself so I just said. "Hey, cheer up. I think it's cute"
He was quiet for a long time before he asked. "What's cute?"

I smiled. "You getting excited over a cellphone, it reminds me that you and I aren't that different from each other and that is why we love each other"

After that my friend, Z, started teasing me about my love-speech. Puh, she's just jealous ;)



I watched the first episode of season 2, The Vampire Diaries. It was....... GREAT. AWESOME. A-MAZING and it totally blew me off my feet. Though I noticed something with me that never happens otherwise. I believe that I looked like a lovesick highschool-girl flaunting over the hot highschool-bully every time Damon was in view. All I could think was 'Omg, he's so funny', 'Aw, he's so smart' and 'God, he's so sexy'

I'm starting to wonder... Am I a fan? Or a groupie?

That's all from me.
xoxo

Molly H.

Tattooed by a sadistic brother

Well, maybe not that much blood but it sure did hurt!

My brother tattooed me, it's not a new one (I got it in June) I just had to fill it and make it look better and get some color in it.

And god dammit! I soo wanted to punch my brother for doing this to me. "is this revenge from Friday when I told you that you're spoiled?" I asked with a forced voice.
  "Nope" he said and continued his sadistic way of tattooing.
  "Is it revenge for T? (my other brother) When I failed with his eyebrows?" I asked.

(I colored T's eyebrows and let's just say that it was my first time and it was the first time T ever told me that he hated me, it stung a little)

  "Nope" my sadistic brother said.
I closed my eyes and focused. "You're pressing the needle harder than you have to!" I really hated him right then, and I wondered what his little sister had done do deserve to get slaughtered.
  "I'm pressing as hard as I need to!" he muttered.
  "Then why the eff does it hurt so much?!" I yelled, ashamed that I was whining so much since this is the third tattoo I've made and none of the others hurt like this.

  "Because you're a wuss!" he yelled back.

It didn't shut me up, I kept whimpering. At least my tattoo got pretty.


(yes, the pic sucks)

That's all for me!

xoxo
Molly

Amazed

Yes, I am.

I wanna jump, squeal and cry at the same time. You can find some of my docs on Scribd's highest rated, most discussed, featured and most read, both poetry and my book, Stolen Kisses :)

Just had to tell you guys, I'm so happy now! 

Swedish musicians and red cheeks.

See! This is why I never compliment peoples work unless I've thoroughly gone through their stuff, websites and stuff!

I came across this AMAZING band ever, they've made covers on a lot of songs that I love, suddenly I heard a remix of Yiruma - River flows in you and I was like OMFG! Is there more people that listen to just that specific song?! And they made a remix!?!

Suddenly I just completely fell in love with them and decided to send them an e-mail, of course in English since I just took for granted that they were english. Later I saw that they had a website and I was like, yay! I'll check it out.

SWEDEN! There's from effing SWEDEN! And I'M from Sweden! And I wrote them an e-mail in English! I sent them another mail (My main-characters is in a band and this was the kind of band I had been looking for) I told them that I hadn't noticed that they were Swedish and that if I had any questions, maybe they could answer them for me?

I hope they'll reply.

Anyways,
byes.
Molly.

Ghosts and dogs.

My mom opened the door to my room this morning. "Did you set the alarm-clock?"
I lifted my head and tried to glare her out of my room, when it didn't work I checked my alarm. "No" I said and tried to fall back asleep.
Mom shifted in the doorway. "Well, shouldn't you?"

I did as she said and closed my eyes again when I heard her coming in the room and stealing my laptop, she left but our big, hairy dog had decided to sneak in my room when mom had the door open. He started licking my hand, and then my arm, and he reached my shoulder when I started mumbling 'Lick my face and you're a dead dog'.

He stopped instantly and I opened my eyes.

Seriously, who can be mad at this dog? Of course I started cuddling with our family dog who looks like a big, black bear instead of the cuddling, nice dog he is. I'll upload a picture later :)


So, this sucks. My aunt told me that my new working place is haunted......... Yes, that's right. HAUNTED. I was like 'Great..... Now I'll never be alone at work....'.I wonder if she knows how much he destroyed my life by saying that.

Well, she didn't really, it's not like I noticed something or anything. All I know is that some places in the hallway makes me feel uncomfortable but hey! That's me. Though, I'm alone here and there's an awfully lot of noise not coming from me or my direction at all. That's whats scaring me!


Back to  work now!

See ya later!
xoxo

Molly.